My struggle with finances goes back a long way, and for years, it carried a lot of shame and embarrassment. Money felt like something I should have figured out by now, so I avoided talking about it altogether.
I’m choosing to be more open now because I know I can’t be the only one who has felt this way. If sharing my story helps even one person feel less alone, then it’s worth it.
I’ve struggled with money since I’ve been in control of my own finances. For years, I suspected ADHD might be playing a role in why budgeting and money management felt so hard for me.
Update: I have since been officially diagnosed with ADHD, and suddenly so many things make sense. If my dad were still here, I could hear him saying, “Okay… so what are you doing about it?” That question has stayed with me and continues to motivate change.
Table of Contents
How ADHD Impacts My Budgeting
Budgeting with ADHD hasn’t been about willpower; it’s been about how my brain processes information.
I struggle to:
- Visualize how much money I can realistically spend
- Understand how long it will take to pay something off
- Feel the “future impact” of credit card purchases
In theory, that probably means I should never be allowed near a credit card. In reality, life isn’t that simple.
ADHD, Credit Cards, and the Feeling of Deprivation
Another challenge in my ADHD budgeting journey has been the feeling of deprivation. Saying no can feel personal like I’m missing out or denying myself something I deserve.
This mindset has taken a lot of work to unpack. ADHD often makes impulse control harder, and when you pair that with emotional spending, it’s easy to see how finances can spiral without intentional systems in place.
Childhood, Money, and Early Financial Lessons
I had a genuinely wonderful childhood. My parents made sure we never worried about having what we needed. While my parents were impoverished when I was born, I have no memory of that season. When I think back, I remember love, security, and a deep sense of being cared for.
My dad worked incredibly hard to build his business, and my mom returned to finish her degree while raising three small children. Hard work and perseverance were always modeled for us.
Interestingly, my dad even had me run the candy machine at his workplace when I was young. I handled inventory, tracked expenses, and recorded profits in a notebook. Looking back, it’s ironic that I learned basic money skills early yet still struggled so much as an adult.
Saying No: A Major Part of My Financial Struggle
One of the most significant contributors to my financial struggles has been my difficulty saying no.
I’ve dealt with:
- Fear of missing out
- Worrying about what people think
- Being a recovering people-pleaser
- Shutting down around pushy salespeople
Often, I’d agree to purchases I didn’t need or couldn’t afford to avoid discomfort. This also led me to buy products from friends in MLMs, even when it stretched my budget.
What I’ve learned is that most people aren’t offended when you say no. They’re simply doing their job or walking their own path. It’s okay not to be involved in everything your friends do. Everyone’s financial situation looks different and that’s okay.
Emotional Spending and Self-Esteem
Another layer of my ADHD and budgeting journey has been emotional spending tied to self-esteem.
I’ve spent money on things promising:
- Weight loss
- Better hair
- Clearer skin
- More confidence
I hoped that this purchase would finally make me feel better. But over time, I’ve learned that spending money I don’t have never brings the contentment or confidence I’m searching for.
This is still a work in progress, especially in a world that often feels superficial but awareness has been a powerful first step.
What I’ve Learned From My ADHD Budgeting Journey
I still have a long way to go, but I’ve also come a long way. The most significant shift has been realizing that I’m not broken, and neither are you if this resonates.
Progress didn’t come from perfection. It came from:
- Awareness instead of avoidance
- Grace instead of shame
- Learning how my brain works
- Creating systems that support ADHD, not fight it
You’re Not Alone in Your Financial Struggle
If any part of this sounds familiar, please know you’re not alone. One of the most complex parts of my struggle with finances was believing I was the only one dealing with it.
If you’d like support, encouragement, and real-life conversations around ADHD, budgeting, and money without judgment, I’d love for you to connect with me:
- Join my Facebook group
- Follow along on social media
- Explore budgeting resources that work for real life
Struggling with money doesn’t mean you’re irresponsible or lazy. It just means you’re human… and learning.